Where You Stand Makes a Difference

You usually think of choreography as part of a play or dance or television production. But a kind of choreography is an important factor in an effective presentation:  where and how you stand.

When beginning a speech, stand to the center of the room where you are generally an equal distance from all members of the audience. If you start by standing to the side or down the center aisle, some listeners will feel left out visually; those you are standing close to may be uncomfortable. Certainly feel free to move in any direction after the beginning of the speech as long as you come back to the centered position you started with.

If you are using the screen at the front of the room for Power Point or slides, stand to the audience’s left. This makes it easier for the audience to read and follow because we read from left to right. Stand facing the audience—not sideways—since you want to keep facing the audience even though they are reading from the screen. Don’t break eye contact with the audience unless it is necessary to check the focus or readability of the content.

Be conscious of your posture. Stand erect with feet seven to twelve inches apart depending on your height; the taller you are the wider the distance. Stand with the weight of your body equally distributed on the balls of your feet. If your weight is on one foot or on a heel, your slouching or uneven posture may keep you from looking confident and in control. When your weight is equally balanced on the balls of your feet, you are in a position to easily take a step for emphasis.

Stand at least three to four feet from the closest audience member. As mentioned earlier in this article, standing too close to people in the audience makes them uncomfortable. They will want to move away, or at the least they will be distracted by thinking that you should move back. Either way this can affect their attention to your content. If you do move into the audience, don’t stay there long to avoid creating long periods of uneasiness for some in the audience.

Finally, make it a point to stand away from the lectern occasionally. If you stand behind the lectern throughout the speech, you may be seen as not caring for the specific audience and may seem a bit aloof as well. Let the audience get a good look at you by taking a step away from the lectern to emphasize a key point. If you tend to get stuck behind the lectern, make a notation in your speech notes to move to the side.

Stand front and center, stand erect, stand to the left of the screen, and stand away from the lectern. Where you stand does make a difference!

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Resolving Conflict

Handling Conflict is not Communication 101; it is a graduate seminar. It is not easy to talk and listen in conflict. Some people will avoid conflict at all costs because of how unpleasant it may be. But as humans, there are times when we must deal with conflict. Here are some suggestions on how to communicate under such circumstances.

Seek to control your emotions. When you are emotionally involved because of anger, frustration, or disappointment you may find it difficult to listen. Usually, when emotions are high, communication is low. You may want to postpone communicating for awhile when emotions are high. Set up another meeting or phone conversation so you will have a chance to cool off. One of the ways to control emotions is to be issue-centered, not personality-centered. When you respond to the personality instead of the issue, the conflict is more likely to escalate than to be defused.

Seek areas of agreement. There is something you can find to agree on if you converse long enough. In a business situation, both the worker and the boss realize that the company has to make a profit to survive. In a family situation you want what is best for the person or the children or the marriage. Look at the broad picture to find areas of agreement. Then when you come to an impasse, return to where you agree. Generally you will not have to go back as far as you did earlier. Eventually, by going back to the areas of agreement you will be able to reach resolution.

Seek to use positive language. Never, for example, tell another person they are wrong—even if they are! This negative language will cause the person to go on the defensive and start justifying his or her position, rather than to find a good solution. Avoid words such as "stupid," "dumb," or "ridiculous" when referring to the other person’s ideas or solutions.

Seek to build credibility with the people you work with because eventually you will have a disagreement. If you have high credibility with the other person, you can discuss an issue longer and with less defensiveness because of the depth of the relationship you have developed. Small talk and talk about family and special hobbies on a routine basis can hold you in good stead when conflict does occur.

Resolving conflict is not easy, but when you reach agreement you will be glad you made the effort; the business, family, or friendship will benefit.